There are often questions about twins when it comes to invites and cards. How do we allow them to be individuals on their special day? Should they get one present between them or one each? The same goes to birthday party invites; should it be one or two?
The answer depends upon the twins: their age, their interests and their interactions with your child. Every situation is unique! Usually, until the children are in high school, you would invite them both. There are only a few exceptions to this: if the twins are very different and one of them would hate the party, not having anything in common with anyone else in attendance, including their own twin. Another exception would be if the twins are getting older and developing their own friend circles.
In most other instances, not only will your child expect both twins to be invited, but so will the parents of the twins – and indeed, many of the other parents too! Once the decision has been made to invite both twins, if this is the appropriate response, more questions arise.
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Should the twins get one invite between them, or should they each get their own?
In most cases, if in any doubt, err on the side of caution and issue an invitation to each child. This will not only help you to keep track of how many people are coming (doubled up invites can leave catering and party-bags short of one or two) but will help the twins understand that they are individuals in their own right as well as being part of a set of twins. When they are too young to read, the invite is essentially for the parent of the twins, and a single invite for both is fine. Do take the time to chat with the parent or guardian first - communication is key! They may have requirements for their children to be treated as individuals rather than as a pair, and if this is the case, respect their wishes as far as possible.
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If the twins are hosting the party, then it is perfectly acceptable for one invite per guest to be sent: duplicates will be costly and can be confusing – although each twin should write a separate thank you note or card to the guests unless they have received a shared gift, in which case, one card, signed by both, is quite acceptable. In all instances, understand that twins are two separate people, and treat them both kindly and as individuals.
